Yesterday, I caught a sixth grade student call someone an asshole. I was walking down the hill toward my classroom and caught him in the eye just as the word escaped his little lips.
Have you ever said something inappropriate, or pointed at someone you thought you recognized but actually didn’t? Have you ever done something that would either A) get you in trouble or B) make you feel embarrassed? And after having done said thing, have you ever made an even grander attempt to cover it up? (Example: Last Thursday, while walking with my friends to Piola’s Pizza for dinner, I thought I recognized our other friend in the distance, dressed in a long red dress. So I pointed at my friend and screamed her name out, and then just as soon saw it wasn’t her. So to compensate for potential embarrassment, I started waving my arms around wildly, making sure to keep pointing at random things, and talking loudly in English so the woman in the red dress wouldn’t think I had been pointing directly at her.)
My point here is this: When I saw this student call another student an “asshole,” and just as we caught eyes, he shook his head and proceeded to repeat the following, as if to suggest he had not said what it was I thought he had said, that in fact he was saying: “ah-oh, ah-oh, ah-oh.”
“Asshole,” minus the S and the L sounds. Clever.
I walked by him giving him a knowing glance down my nose while and his reddening cheeks continued to mouth “ah-oh” as if it were a jaw exercise he did regularly in the middle of the hallway in the afternoon in between fifth and sixth periods.
Nice try, kid. Better luck next time. I know all your tricks.